Last night I got stoned and bloody for the first time

Last night I got stoned and bloody.

I went out to be social last night, still reeling from the motorcycle positivity and open mindedness on Friday.

So I hung out at a friends house, drank half a beer, while they got stoned. Did not know you could get “contact high” from second hand smoke. But, apparently I did for the first time. Heres my thoughts on that.

I always thought getting high from pot would be like that feeling of ecstasy right after really good sex when the room is spinning and your entire body feels good. Or like the adrenaline off going 100 mph with the wind in your hair. Mind altering like a 70s movie where the world looks like candy land and everyone’s funny and happy and you have the urge to be Michelangelo the painter.

It aint shit! It was boring. I was like “this is it?” Okay slightly relaxed, a bit friendlier and more mellow. But shit, I get more chemical changes in my body from a can of red bull or a beer. This is barely anything. This slight spaciness is worth dumping girlfriends, loosing jobs, starving cause your broke, getting kicked outta your house, burning you family, hurting people, and basically giving up everything in your life? Wtf?!! This! This is nothing. All that hype. I get better rush off jumping off a waterfall. I always thought the extreme things I do was to make up for the fact that I wasn’t getting high so I can catch up with everybody. Its nothing compared to my normal life. Its boooorrring! Omg I can not believe this little thing means so much to people. Its stupid. Idiots. It just made me feel really lazy. Fuck that I’m going back to skateboarding.

Which is what I did high and drunk. I bombed a hill with my longboard. Lucky there was no cars. I was racing a skateboarder, not realizing how much faster a long board is. I passed her, flyin. Approaching the bottom of the hill I realized my foot coordination and balance was off. Saw the gravel and sharp turn. First thought that ran through my head: “Never go faster than you can run.” Yea. I knew I couldn’t run that fast. But I tried!

Tried to do the running jump off my board. Got three steps across the road. The last step was too slow. I went flying. Skidded across the road to the grass. Someone ended up flipping over bashing the back of my head on something hard. Realized the next day I owned an helmet and I had never skated without it. First time and I crash. Left forarm cut up. Upper left arm, scrapped. Stomach scraped from when shirt ran up. Left thumb, Bruised! Never saw the pad of a thumb bruised very strange. Back of head, possible concussion. Right knee worst part, bleeding. Ass, hurts.

I’m lying on the ground saying “my head hurts. It really fuckin hurts.” Afraid that I might have to go to the hospital stoned. The guy I just met sprints down the neighborhood freakin out trying to make sure I was okay. Apparently I had just missed hitting a metal pole which I would have if I hadn’t tripped. They try getting me up. Then they take my board.

I’m up in a second. I take it away from them. And I ride back. My friend says I’m ready to learn to ride a dirt bike.

* Sibhi

mama says

Lesson Learned:1.  weed aint shit, much better highs in life. 2. probably not a good idea to ride drunk or high. 3. long-boards way faster than skateboards. 4. I can handle.

First Time Motorcycle

I had the best day ever yesterday and I can’t tell anyone or they’ll take it away and make me feel bad about having so much fun.

I was supposed to go pick up my nephew. As written in a previous blog. This would have taken my entire day, I day I desperately needed. My sister offered to pick him up early. My mom tore her a new one said that I had to do it. So my trusty Darkness gave up his day to pick him up. And ended up babysitting. Okay, so I ruined his day for mine. I’m very sorry about that. I do feel that it was my moms control freakiness that ruined his day. Someone’s miscommunication that didn’t come home and take care of him to make it worse. And technically, his fault for being the reason my mom keeps demanding reciprocity for me (see: rant – ambition). But I’ll never tell him that.

So when everyone’s day was being ruined, this is what I was secretly doing.

I rode a 650 Ninja. First time on a motorcycle. Oh yeah. Diablo black!

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And it was soooo cool like nothing I ever expected.

First of all, I expected scary wind blowing fear like a roller coaster. For the most part, it was like a beautiful tram ride. I couldn’t tell we were going at high speeds. I didn’t expect it to be relaxing and mind clearing.  I don’t remember there ever being a time that I had nothing on my mind. That I wasn’t running a million scenarios, problems, things to do, issues in my head at once.  My brain is like add on steroids, it just doesn’t stop. Ever. Especially this week when I been fighting with my boss, mom, boy, self. I’ve just been on the verge of a complete breakdown.

And then suddenly, nothing. No worries, fears, nothing. Just beautiful emptiness and clarity inside my mind. It was like someone hit the empty button on the recycle bin. I was almost lightheaded. I was actually quiet. Usually I’m a self-conscious chatter box. Everything I seek an escape in is now moot. Don’t need alcohol. Don’t need to fantasize about drugs, cigarettes, suicide. This is better than any of that. I’m still on my first ride high. And suddenly, I just don’t care about the bullshit anymore. Its just not important.

Everything was so beautiful. Its strange. I’ve lived here so long I’ve gotten tired of seeing the same old things. But this, everything looked new like I’ve never really seen the world before. I was in awe of my surroundings. I was spacing out on everything, grass trees flowers water. It was amazing.

I went into the mountains pass 3000 foot drops. Took pin tight turns. Tried to climb a mango tree. And my favorite part, going really really fast! We went so fast our helmets were covered in bugs! We went over 100 mph passing people. Omg omg omg! I was singing the power rangers theme song and yeehawwing! I had so much fun. I did not want to stop.

I think we rode for like 5 hours. My butt is killing me. My thighs are killing me. But there just a happy reminder that I just had the best day of my life. I wanna write more and I might if I think of anything else but I should probably sleep. Adrenaline still pumping through me. Sooo fun!

And that theres way more to life than the petty bullshit if you can escape. Going over 100mph, yeah you’ll escape. J

Sibhi